Advocacy, communication, and partnership are all terms often used early in a military-connected student’s transition to a new campus. Shifts in learning platforms to e-learning, hybrid learning, and social distancing have challenged schools and families to become creative in how they build, operate, and strengthen student-advocacy teams.

For many military-connected families, the pandemic-induced school experience, now spanning three academic school years, has created a negative academic and social-emotional impact on students and their learning experience. Any military-connected student who has faced a move to a new school during this timeframe feels the impacts of their traditional Season of Leaving and Season of Arriving as well as the added challenges of transitioning amid a pandemic.

Strong student-advocacy teams recognize this unique challenge for our military-connected student population.

Build the Advocacy Team

The first step in building an advocacy team in or out of a pandemic situation is to recognize who should be part of the team. A traditional student-advocacy team is built by the classroom teacher and parent, together with the student when appropriate. A strong communication strategy is critical between the classroom teacher and parent. Conversations should center around classwork and homework expectations as well as deeper discussions of how the student is adjusting to the school, classmates, and the pandemic learning environment.

Take extra care to recognize that a student transitioning to a new school during the pandemic may experience increased gaps and overlaps of student learning. But, just as important as academics, the student-advocacy team needs to pay special attention to focus on student needs and open the conversation around the emotional and mental health status of the student.

Invite the School Counselor

These discussions bring opportunities to assess whether a military-connected student is struggling to adjust or beginning to thrive on campus. If a student is struggling, it is time to invite others to the advocacy team. The school counselor is a great campus resource for both academic and emotional support. A counselor can work alongside the teacher and parent to help develop a multi-step plan to support the student. Often, school counselors have access to added resources like tutoring and emotional support strategies.

Consider MFLC Support

Many schools and districts also have access to Military Family Life Counselors (MFLC). An MFLC can become part of the student-advocacy team. With parental permission, MFLC can support military-connected students as they deal with everyday stressors such as communication, family dynamics, grief or loss, deployment, reintegration, relocation, and relationships. Even when a MFLC is not assigned to a particular school or district, families have access to MFLC support by calling their installation military and family support center or MilitaryOneSource.

Military Family Liaison

Some military-connected school districts now have on staff family liaisons for military-connected youth. While these liaisons do not work directly with students, they are often available to partner with parents and families who are new to the school. The liaisons help families understand a school’s culture, policies, procedures, and practices. Often, they can help the family make connections to resources within the greater community to help a student acclimate to the area.

Tutor.com for Military Students

When making plans to support students with academic struggles, the first step is to work directly with the teacher and then look to tutoring and homework help offered through the school. Often students do not realize they need help on individual assignments until they are home. In these cases, a free membership to Tutor.com allows military-connected students access to tutor help around the clock. Tutor.com offers personalized help in more than 100 subjects for grades K-12 and college students.

Student-Focused Reminders 

• Keep the student at the center of conversations
• Focus conversations on specific supports for the military-connected student
• Ensure everyone agrees to the level and type of support offered by the school and obtain parental permissions as required
• Include the student in the decision-making process
• Be creative in communication techniques (e.g., a mix of in-person, phone, email, video conferencing)
• Set a plan to connect at regular times to check progress

Times are challenging for students, parents, and teachers alike. A strong student-advocacy team ensures all key roles work together to provide the best possible support for student success.

Amanda Trimillos, EdD, is a military spouse, mother, and National Board-Certified teacher with extensive experience teaching military students in the United States and overseas. She is coauthor of Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers and wrote the essay “School Choices and Changes” in  Stories Around the Table: Laugher, Wisdom, and Strength in Military Life.

More about advocacy teams and supporting students in pandemic circumstances and transitions:

• First Parent-Teacher Conference at a New School
• Bringing School Home: Focus on the Possibilities
• Start Early for a Strong Student-Advocacy Team

The post Building Sustaining Advocacy Teams in Challenging Times appeared first on Seasons of My Military Student.

Parent-teacher conferences are essential checkpoints for military students attending a new school. Parent-teacher conferences are the speed bump during the Seasons of Transition ™, an event in which parents and teachers can align their expectations. This usually takes place six weeks after the start of school. And in the cycle of school transition, a student should be progressing through the Season of Arriving and ready to get to work in the Season of Growing.

The first parent-teacher conference is a good time to intentionally assess the student’s initial class placement, academic work, and social adjustment.

Tips for Approaching the First Conference at a New School

• The first rule of thumb is to listen more and talk less. Or sometimes a parent should sit on their hands when the teacher is explaining a student’s progress. It’s important to let the teacher do their job and for parents to listen to someone who sees the child as their student, not just their child. Children may behave differently at home than in a classroom around other adults and children. It’s a different window, a different view of the student, and it can be an eye-opening experience.
• Bring the student’s Education Binder to the conference. Ideally, if the student is new to the school, the Education Binder should be given to the teacher before the conference. Allow the teacher some time to review it. The binder is one of the tools parents can use to better document their student’s education history. It allows informal continuity between schools and should tell a student’s education story. It’s not just about grades, but an overview of the child’s previous years in school. With most military-connected students, attending six to nine different schools is common. The Education Binder allows educators to have a better understanding of their new students and the unique, but sometimes challenging aspects of the highly mobile lifestyle.
• Bring the student to the conference, if age-appropriate, and come prepared to ask questions or address any concerns they might have. It’s a good idea for students to write their questions down on an index card in advance so nerves can’t derail the inquiries.
• Share the family PCS story with the teacher. During the Parent-Teacher Conference is the right time to explain the challenges or struggles the student faced during the recent move. If parents have concerns with the student’s adjustment, especially the social and emotional aspects of a new school, this is the perfect time to talk about that. Teachers want to help any student who may not be thriving yet. It’s also a good time to address a past or upcoming deployment, living in temporary housing, or additional challenges at home.

Bring your patience … It’s been hard on military-connected students, their parents, and the educators who teach them.

• Bring your patience. The profound effect the pandemic has had on education will be long-lasting. Every school, city, and state has handled the pandemic in education differently. And schools, teachers and families are still not operating at pre-pandemic standards. It’s been hard on military-connected students, their parents, and the educators who teach them. It’s still not a normal year, but teachers are doing their very best under incredibly stressful circumstances. So give grace when the opportunity presents itself.
• A parent-teacher conference is one of many check-ins a parent can have with a teacher to discuss academic or social and emotional progress. A typical conference is usually only 15-20 minutes long, certainly not enough time to dive into a military student’s rich history of multiple moves and challenges, so schedule a follow-up meeting 3-4 weeks after the first parent-teacher conference. This will give the teacher some time to address initial concerns.

Questions to Ask During the First Parent-Teacher Conference

Most military-connected children need to be socially and emotionally connected before their academics can be a priority. Use the first parent-teacher conference to discuss social-emotional concerns. It’s important not to chase curriculum this year, but to focus on the student’s needs first.

• What does lunch look like for the student? Is the student sitting alone or with others?
• What does recess or free time look like for the student?
• Is the student participating in groups?
• Is the student asking questions?
• Ask for assistance in friendship matching. If the student isn’t quite fitting in yet or has voiced concerns about a lack of connecting, ask the teacher for help establishing connections in the classroom.
• Is the student ahead or behind in the school’s curriculum?
• Is the student’s placement in leveled groups or class correct?
• What are the academic expectations? When does standard testing begin?
• What type of support does the teacher or school offer if the student is struggling academically?
• Address any mismatched curriculum, gaps and overlaps.

Parents and teachers who collaborate together and honor each other’s roles create a strong student-advocacy team. The first conference is one important step to ensuring a military-connected student has the support they need to grow and thrive for the rest of the school year.

Stacy Huisman is an Air Force spouse, mother of two, and freelance writer. An advocate with a passion for military-connected children and their families, Stacy is coauthor of Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers. She’s dedicated the last decade to understanding the challenges military kids face when changing schools. 

You may also enjoy reading:

• Creating an Education Binder
• Start Early for a Strong Student-Advocacy Team
• Proactive Communication for Students in Every Season

The post First Parent-Teacher Conference at a New School appeared first on Seasons of My Military Student.

Building a strong student-advocacy team is essential for military-connected students. As the school year begins in a pandemic environment, now more than ever, the team-building strategy should include supporting teachers, as well as students.

Military-connected students at new schools won’t be the only ones navigating a new learning landscape this year. Teachers are also feeling uncertainty and stress. For educators, going back to school in a pandemic environment is a new frontier, whether classrooms are virtual, in-person and socially distanced, or a combination. In addition to welcoming new students, teachers are preparing new ways of learning for all their students, while balancing personal concerns about staying healthy and managing their own children’s education.

Becky, a military parent and a district school psychologist in Virginia, encourages parents to advocate for their children while also giving grace and understanding to teachers.

“There are a lot of uncomfortable feelings around the start of school in many places,” says Becky. “Things keep changing. The uncertainty affects everyone and can be unnerving for teachers and parents. If educators also have kids in the district, they may be feeling what parents are feeling. They’re struggling alongside parents.”

Educators who are also parents may be experiencing the same struggles as the parents of their students.

Sarah is a high school teacher in a military-heavy district in South Carolina, which has opted for in-person classes with a virtual option. She says there is some uncertainty around how the requirements for masks and social distancing will work out when classes actually begin in September.

“Our administration is trying to have a plan for as many contingencies as possible, but just not knowing how it’s really going to be plays a role in beginning-of-the-year fears.”

Becky’s district, which also serves many military students, is beginning the school year with virtual-only classes, which presents its own challenges. Like other working parents, teachers may also have their own children attending virtual classes from home.

“There’s also a learning curve for the technology,” says Becky. “It’s exciting, but also intimidating for those who haven’t been teaching in this manner to now have to do that. Offering that grace is so important. Remember a lot of these things that are frustrating (to parents) aren’t even in the teacher’s control. Technology issues, even decisions about virtual versus [in-person] school.”

Stress management and support are important for teachers as well as students, says Becky. As part of a clinical team in her district, she is available to support both students and educators, to be a listening ear, or offer professional development for stress management.

Stress management and support are important for teachers as well as students.

“There’s a big push for social and emotional learning (for students) in our school curriculum,” she says. “As our teachers are teaching their students, they are also reinforcing those skills for themselves, about feelings identification and how to manage big emotions. Emotional wellness is a critical part of learning. Your emotions will respond before your thinking and learning brain can activate.”

In spite of all the uncertainty, military-connected students and their parents can proactively help create an environment of understanding at a new school with good communication at the outset.

Becky and Sarah both advise military-connected parents to introduce their students to new teachers ahead of time, just as they would in any move. If a face-to-face meeting is not available, an email will serve to share any information that would be helpful for teachers to know up front.

“Let teachers know your concerns as a parent,” says Becky. “Put those in the first email, especially anything not in their records. Let teachers know your child is new. It’s true that everybody is new to this (pandemic) situation, but it’s important for teachers to know who is totally new to a community. Keep it short and clear.”

The pandemic situation is new to everyone, but teachers still need to know when students are new to their school and community.

Students attending class virtually may have a harder time connecting, Sarah adds, so an introduction, even by email, is even more important this year for connecting teachers and students.

“If the student is in middle or high school, encourage him or her to begin advocating for themselves, if they don’t already.” Older students can send an email to their teachers to introduce themselves.

Having an Education Binder of information about a student is ideal, says Becky, but if school is virtual and that’s not possible, send key information by email. Perhaps a face-to-face meeting can be planned at a later date, when parents can discuss the binder with teachers.

Sarah, who grew up in a military family and changed schools many times, knows from experience as both educator and student the importance of knowing a student’s military background. Limited contact in a virtual or hybrid classroom may make it more difficult to get to know students, so the more information a teacher has, the better. Knowing a student has attended multiple schools lets the teacher know to look out for potential gaps and overlaps in curriculum or learning.

Limited contact in a virtual or hybrid classroom may make it more difficult to get to know students, so the more information a teacher has, the better.

After classes begin, parents can support teachers by encouraging their students to engage fully in their new classes, whether virtually or in person.

“Work with your child, encourage them to participate,” says Becky. “Make sure your child is holding up their end of the bargain, getting work done, attending virtual or real classes. Teachers may feel deflated when they are trying to reach students virtually and don’t get a response back.”

Sarah will be teaching in person and will have students attending online as well.

“I am going to have to encourage those who are doing school at home to remember that they are in school,” she says. “I can only help students if they show up.”

Both students and teachers may struggle with the virtual environment, especially when it comes to getting to know one another, says Becky.

“Teachers want to be with kids, to build relationships. So much is missing when you’re doing it virtually. This is hard for them too,” she says. Becky offers a few more ideas for ways to show support for teachers while advocating for students:

• Extend extra grace, patience, and understanding whenever you can. Remember, everyone is traveling a new path together, and everyone is feeling more uncertainty and stress than usual.
• Let teachers know you are there to support them. Ask how you can support them and offer to share your areas of expertise or time if you are able.
• If you have concerns about your child, talk to the teacher, and don’t hesitate to reach out to school mental health resources as well: a counselor, social worker, or psychologist.
• Keep teachers informed about difficulties, whether technical, personal, or academic.
• When emailing a teacher about an issue or to request a time to talk, give the teacher 24 to 48 hours to respond. They may not be able to respond during non-class hours when they are at home caring for their families.
• Send teachers random notes and emails of gratitude and support. Let them know what is working well for your student and when you appreciate what they are doing.

“Remember that many of us are parents too,” says Sarah. “We came into this profession because we love kids. This is a super weird and stressful time for everyone. When we enter into community with anyone, the best default is to trust. … I want what parents want—the best for their kids. If we can keep an open dialogue, things will start better.”

Terri Barnes is the mother of three military children who attended a combined twenty-seven schools, K-12. She is the author of  Spouse Calls: Messages from a Military Life and editor of  Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers.

More about supporting families and educators:

• Q and A with School Superintendent Jesse Najera
• How Schools can Help Military Kids Moving in a Pandemic by Stacy Allsbrook-Huisman in Military Times
• The Pandemic’s Toll on Teachers is Palpable by Marc Brackett, Mark Cannizzaro, and Scott Levy in EdSurge

The post Back to School: Supporting Teachers Strengthens the Team appeared first on Seasons of My Military Student.

Jesse Najera is the superintendent of Silver Valley Unified School District in California. He is also a member of the California State Council of the Military Interstate Children’s Compact Commission. Military-connected students make up seventy-five percent of Silver Valley’s 2,200 students. The district’s seven schools, Pre-K to 12th grade, serve military families from Fort Irwin and Marine Corps Logistics Base Barstow.

This year, California’s COVID measures required all schools in Silver Valley to begin the academic year in virtual classes. One day after the district’s teachers and staff were back on their campuses, Jesse took a few minutes to talk about ways to support teachers, students, and parents in this new and unusual school year. 

TB: What are some of the obstacles you, your administrators and teachers are facing, personally and professionally, as you begin this school year with virtual classes?

JN: Obstacle one is the unknown, the fear of the unknown. Every day the information changes about how kids are affected by COVID. As a superintendent I want to have kids on campus, but I also want the safest choice for our students. Right now that is virtual school. It’s not just a matter of our parents and the community we serve, but also our teachers have families, and they’re concerned for their health.

I want to have kids on campus, but I also want the safest choice for our students … also our teachers have families, and they’re concerned for their health.

One obstacle for our educators is childcare. Most of our educators’ families are working families, meaning both parents are working. Teachers and staff are running the virtual school from their schools and classrooms, even though students are staying home. Distance learning means their own kids are also not going to school.

TB: What are some ways your district supports educators, including teachers, counselors, teaching assistants, and others?

JN: From the beginning of the summer we brought in leaders from every campus in our district to talk weekly to prepare for distance learning. It’s a real collaboration with our teachers and staff. Our teachers are parents. Our principals are parents and have kids in our schools. So for those educators who have to be here teaching, we’ve set up learning labs for their own kids to be here, because they can’t be home for distance learning for them while they’re teaching. Our staff has confidence that we’re not going to take shortcuts with safety. We started back this week [with teachers at the schools]. If we can’t prove we can keep kids safe when there’s a small number of kids there for childcare, we’ll have no credibility to bring more students back if we move to the hybrid model. We’re using distancing protocols, we’re cleaning … we’re wearing face masks. We’ve also given our teachers an option to work from home if they have a legitimate medical reason.

TB: How would you encourage parents of new military-connected students to approach teachers and create cooperative relationships?

JN: A lot of our military parents are trained and advised to be advocates. In a lot of places they have to go and fight to get what they need for their kids. That’s not Silver Valley. I am on the California council for the Interstate Compact Commission. We’re front and center with the Interstate Compact. We’re telling parents, “Here’s how we will support your kids according to the compact.”

When you come in as a parent and show empathy to teachers, recognize they are parents too. When a parent approaches a teacher and says, “I’m here to support you. What can I do?” a teacher knows there’s an ally there. It’s not going to be adversarial. Educators appreciate hearing what they are doing right. It makes us want to do even more for them.

When a parent approaches a teacher and says, “I’m here to support you. What can I do?” a teacher knows there’s an ally there.

Also, teachers appreciate parents who offer to help, particularly in the world of technology at the moment. I’ve seen virtual plans for family nights and PTA nights, and I’m thinking, “Wow, all this creativity!” Sometimes that comes straight from parents who say “I can help.” That’s the kind of volunteer we need right now when we can’t have people on campus. 

TB: Military parents often worry their kids will fall between the cracks with any school transition. This year, military families who are moving into virtual or hybrid school environments are even more on edge about this possibility. How do you reassure parents of new military-connected students?

JN: We did five or six town halls for parents, telling them to ask us anything, and asking them to share their experiences with distance learning. We had 26,000 people who saw one of our town halls, and that was only because the army used their platforms to share it. We have great partnerships with both commands and with the commanders. That’s a big deal. We partner with them in many ways, and that includes communication.

We have a lot of video and media showing the technology in our classrooms. The first thing we love to do is get on the phone with them. We want parents to feel great about (their students) coming here. It’s even more important now, because they’re really concerned about what distance learning is going to do for their kids. We want to show them we have live daily instruction. We’re providing laptops for students who need them, providing hot spots for students who need internet connectivity. A student will go home with a whole suite of tools and textbooks. We’re not just telling them to log on to the computer and leave them on their own.

Educators appreciate hearing what they are doing right.

We want to help new parents know what’s coming, make a family feel better about where they’re coming. Fort Irwin is remote. I can’t do anything about the distance, but I can speak to the quality of our programs and what we’ve been recognized for.

Our school is used to military students. Especially for a parent of a high school kid, we tell them we know transcripts. We know how to bring in units from somewhere else. We’re going to get you to graduation. We have forty percent turnover every two years, but we still find ways to get them to graduation. We have had a graduation rate of a hundred percent over the past two years. We want to assure them, your kid’s not going to take a step back by any means. In fact, we’re going to catapult them forward. We have our website, a school guide; we have videos on YouTube. We say,”Read all about us.” We’re not perfect, but we have a quality program, and we’re always looking for ways to get better. 

TB: How can military parents partner with teachers in the midst of a pandemic to support their kids and help them adjust socially and academically?

JN: That’s a challenge, because that’s such a big part of school. We have a top-of-the-line social and emotional curriculum, and we’ve made it a priority. There’s dedicated time in the master schedule, whether in distance learning or on campus, for social emotional activities for team-building and social-skill development.

Sure, kids can do their work on their own later in the day, but if they do that every day they’re not coming to class … Students need to socialize regularly with peers even if it’s in Zoom.

In virtual classes, we’ve told parents we’re taking attendance daily, because sure, kids can do their work on their own later in the day, but if they do that every day they’re not coming to class and seeing other kids. Students need to socialize regularly with peers even if it’s in Zoom. We purchased the highest suite Zoom offers, so teachers have options to get kids together in breakout rooms in small groups. So for instance, four of them can work together on a project. We keep that in mind, looking for ways to get kids working together.

We also have a virtual counseling program that has been very successful and is available to any student who needs some help or attention for a particular issue.

I walked around all my campuses on our first day of school, and it’s such an eerie feeling not to see any kids. The second the county allows it, and when we feel safe, we’ll start—even if it’s smaller groups to begin with—we will welcome kids back to our classrooms.

Terri Barnes, senior editor at Elva Resa Publishing, is the author of  Spouse Calls: Messages from a Military Life and editor of  Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers.

Top photo: A teacher leads virtual learning at Silver Valley Unified School District in August 2020. Inset: Jesse Najera (Photos courtesy Silver Valley Unified School District and Jesse Najera.)

More about supporting teachers and students:

• Supporting Teachers Strengthens the Team
• Helping Kids Navigate Uncertainty from Military Family Life

The post Superintendent Emphasizes Support for Teachers, Students, Parents appeared first on Seasons of My Military Student.

No matter what kind of classes are planned for the coming school year, building a strong student-advocacy team is essential, and it starts early. The foundation for that team begins with the initial communication between education professionals and incoming military families. Whether the first meeting happens in person, by phone or video chat, teachers and parents of military students want to make the most of their time together and cover essential transition topics.

For the first encounter, everyone on the student-advocacy team, including parents, teachers, and the student, should come prepared to talk about what concerns them most. Parents can streamline this conversation by sending an email to the school counselor to introduce the student before the first meeting. This email should detail past moves, curriculum changes, education needs, and any social-emotional concerns, particularly in light of moving during a pandemic. This sets the tone and agenda so the first meeting can focus on problem solving.

With pandemic concerns in mind, parents and students will want to know how the receiving state and district are approaching decisions about virtual school options. Many schools throughout the country are planning for possible on-site instruction and also offering online options for students who need or prefer to learn at home.

The receiving teacher needs to know about a military-connected student’s academic and personal history, including the number of moves, past schools, and possible upcoming family separations or deployments. Discussions should include any possible gaps and overlaps in a student’s learning, past experiences with virtual learning, and ways to help the student engage socially and emotionally with classmates.

Social and emotional adjustment is important to the overall well-being of any student but especially one who has just moved to a new place. Students want to make new friends and connections. Teachers hope build class camaraderie, perhaps starting in a virtual setting in preparation for an eventual return to face-to-face learning. The team should discuss strategies for helping the student connect and feel included at a new school.

Along with the social and emotional impact, parents, teachers, and students should also discuss the student’s academic experiences with online learning. What were the positive or negative effects of virtual classes or lessons? What strategies will help this student thrive, whether in a real or virtual classroom or at home?

Families and teachers should know the provisions of the Interstate Compact on Educational Opportunity for Military Students and how they can help in any transition to assure educational services, appropriate class placement and more.

Student involvement in these conversations is helpful, especially for secondary students, but elementary students can also take part in parent-teacher conferences as a way to learn self-advocacy and good communication skills.

It’s important for everyone who participates to listen and respect one another’s unique perspectives. The coming school year holds many unknowns for everyone. Effective communication and a strong student-advocacy team is more essential than ever for military-connected students to thrive in all the Seasons of Transition^TM.

Adapted from Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers by Amanda Trimillos, EdD, and Stacy Allsbrook-Huisman (2018, Elva Resa Publishing)

• How Schools can Help Military Kids Moving in a Pandemic by Stacy Allsbrook-Huisman in Military Times
• New School: 5 Tips to Prepare Your Student by Amanda Trimillos

The post Start Early for a Strong Student-Advocacy Team appeared first on Seasons of My Military Student.

As schools around the world respond to the spread of coronavirus by shifting to online classes for essential instruction, military-connected students and their parents are bringing school home. While schools create virtual learning environments and provide curriculum, parents find themselves involved in their children’s education in new ways every day.

Amanda Trimillos, EdD, and Stacy Allsbrook-Huisman, military spouses and coauthors of Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers, say parents don’t need to panic about the class time their students will miss. They and other experienced educators agree this is the time to take a deep breath and focus on possibilities rather than limitations.

Give Grace

“First, give yourself, your students, and your school time and grace to settle into a new routine,” says Amanda, a teacher and mother of four, who is managing varying levels of instruction for her four children now at home. “We’ve had difficult days like everyone else. It will take time to find our groove but we will. We’re all on a steep learning curve, but we can come out of this with new skills and a new appreciation for each other.”

Stacy, whose two children are also learning at home, says establishing routines and keeping balance is essential for parents so they can provide stability for their children.

“My kiddos are looking at me for their emotional compass,” she says. “If I’m showing cracks, they’ll take it on themselves. So, my day is filled with lots of forgiveness and grace.”

Reassure

Home school mom and Marine Corps wife Lindsay Swoboda says parents who now have their children home during the school day should remember their primary role is to reassure their children, especially when they are affected by the uncertainty of the times.

“My hope is that they won’t just be their child’s teacher,” she says. “Be their parent. Be a safe place to land in all this craziness. For all of us, the best we can do is our best … in this time, what we have to give has to be enough. We are not required to be any more of a super-parent than we already are. What is required is more grace, more forgiveness, more resolve to rest in the love in front of us.”

Claire Wood is an army wife with experience in education, both as a classroom teacher and home educator of her three children. She reassures parents that a change in schooling method, even missed days of instruction won’t necessarily deter academic success. She suggests thinking about the possibilities now open instead of the schools now closed.

Find Fun

“Let it be fun,” says Claire. “Let this be a time to fan the flame of their own natural curiosity, love of learning, and engagement with the world around them.”

Both Claire and Lindsay emphasize that learning at home does not take as many hours as a day in a full classroom. Parents don’t have to fill every hour with schoolwork or feel obligated to provide entertainment.

“Let this be a time to fan the flame of their own natural curiosity, love of learning, and engagement with the world around them.”

–Claire Wood

“What might take more than a day with twenty-plus students in a classroom can be streamlined to mere hours are home,” says Lindsay. This means more free time, which calls for creativity, especially when getting together with friends is not an option.

Parents can give kids responsibility for filling some of their own time, providing age-appropriate parental supervision, of course. Parents also need to take time to keep themselves healthy and spend time doing things they enjoy. Getting outside for sunshine and fresh air when possible and incorporating movement and exercise each day—even when you have to stay indoors—helps create a healthy routine for both parents and kids.

Claire adds, “There is no right or wrong way to use this time. Let your kids do something they enjoy or study something they want to learn more about. Help them look for ways to engage their minds and their hearts.”

Terri Barnes is a veteran military spouse, journalist, and author of Spouse Calls: Messages From a Military Life. As senior editor for Elva Resa Publishing, Terri was the lead editor of  Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers.

Amanda, Stacy, Lindsay, and Claire offer these practical ideas for learning at home.

• Choose a historical period and read about influential people from that era. Watch a movie or documentary that highlights events and people. Talk about what was surprising, new, different from the world today.
• Read, read, read! Don’t forget audiobooks, ebooks, or movies about books and authors. Many libraries offer digital resources to check out online.
• Send (real) mail! Kids can write to veterans homes where residents can no longer receive visitors and to family members and friends who are far away. Handwritten letters and homemade cards are fun to create and always appreciated.
• Find science experiments online that can be done safely at home.
• Take a virtual field trip. Search online for virtual tours of museums, zoos, and national parks, and more.
• Play, read, or study outside when possible. Recharge with sunshine and fresh air.
• Involve kids in household chores. This teaches kids what it takes to keep a house in order and helps get chores done.
• Give creative time. Build with Legos; work on jigsaw puzzles; solve math or word puzzles; create art projects.

For more resources, see this list of Online Resources for Learning at Home.

To connect with Amanda, Stacy, and other supporters of military-connected students, join the Seasons of My Military Student Cultivation Team Room on Facebook.

Read Lindsay’s blog at Uplifting Anchor.

Listen to Claire’s Advice Not Given podcast and read her blog The Story of Our Lives.

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A good book club is an opportunity to gather with friends, enjoy favorite beverages, snacks, and good conversation. The best book clubs are those where everyone in the room is engaged in the book, eager to know more, and ready to dig into the content. This describes the book clubs I’ve attended to talk about Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers. Many of the participants come with stories to share and a list of questions to discuss. The pages of their books are bright with highlighted sections, the margins filled with penciled notes, because this is a book that speaks to their experiences, both personal and professional.

The pages of their books are bright with highlighted sections, the margins filled with penciled notes, because this is a book that speaks to their experiences, both personal and professional.

Seasons of My Military Student book clubs are for groups and individuals interested in supporting military-connected students. In these clubs, parents, teachers, administrators, and civic organizations can engage networks of support while learning about the lives and perspectives of students in military families.

These groups have a common focus on understanding military-connected students. They include parents, school counselors, administrators, faculty, school liaison officers, and others, all with a desire to create a community of support for themselves as well as for students.

Seasons of My Military Student covers the Seasons of Transition^TM that mobile military students experience with each school change, offering tools and strategies for each season and storm of military life. The book gives parents and teachers a closer look at how the education of military-connected students is affected by each challenge these students face. Reading as a group gives everyone a chance to discuss their own perspectives and hear from others.

Getting Started

Any group or individual interested in supporting military kids can start a Seasons of My Military Student book club: a parent-teacher organization, family support group, military spouse organization, school advisory committee, school administration, faculty, parents, civic group, or local church.

The essentials include:

• Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers book for each participant
• Downloadable Seasons Book Club Guide, which includes Discussion Guide and Getting Started Guide
• A comfortable place to meet for one to four sessions

Each book club may choose a different focus depending on the needs of the attendees. For example, one group could be geared toward families in the community who are facing deployment, to discuss how family separation affects a child’s education. Another might be for families who have just moved into the community—or those who are preparing to leave. Still another group might be aimed at the needs of military-connected high school students and their parents, or parents helping their elementary students transition to middle school.

Seasons of My Military Student is designed to address various challenges for students in military life and offer practical and healthy ways to meet those challenges. Participants learn about maintaining student records in an Education Binder, how to use resources such as the Military Child Interstate Compact Commission, essential questions for parent-teacher meetings, and more.

An ideal group ranges from five to fifteen people, small enough for meaningful conversations and large enough to include a variety of perspectives. Larger sessions are possible too, with good planning and enough time to allow discussion.

Creating Connections

For me, the most beautiful part of a Seasons of My Military Student book club is watching group participants form support networks for themselves while learning about supporting military kids. Each participant could simply read Seasons of My Military Student on his or her own, and they do. The added value of the book club is the camaraderie, encouragement, confirmation, help, and friendship they gain, all while learning to see military life through the eyes of their students.

And that is exactly what Seasons of My Military Student is about—as a book and as a community—building teams of advocacy, building support, and building resilience for military-connected students.

Amanda Trimillos, EdD, is the coauthor with Stacy Allsbrook-Huisman of Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers. Amanda is a teacher, a military spouse, and mother of four military-connected students.

• Download the free Seasons Book Club Guide from Elva Resa Publishing.
• Get case discounts at MilitaryFamilyBooks.com.
• Contact our team if you are interested in a virtual author visit or other support for Seasons of My Military Student Book Clubs.

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In any season, says teacher and military mom Amanda Trimillos, parents should let teachers know about deployments, taking operational security into account. Awareness strengthens cooperation between parent and teacher and allows the teacher to give full support to the student during deployment.

“I remember the first time my husband was deployed over the holidays,” she says. “He missed every single holiday from birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas—It was a difficult time for us all, especially for him because he was missing milestones with his own kids. There were several keys for us to make the time memorable for him and to help the kids connect with him so far away.”

Sending Gifts

When making holiday crafts to give parents for Christmas, Amanda reminds teachers that students with a deployed parent may wish to mail their gift. Not all classroom crafts are easy to package and send, so consider digital options for projects, says Amanda.

During one of her husband’s deployments, Amanda’s daughter’s class made a picture book of class activities. Her daughter was able to create a digital version for her dad.

“The students made books filled with pictures of them in class,” says Amanda. “I unwrapped a printed version at home. Dad opened the digital version in his deployed location. Eight years later it is still his favorite development gift.

TIP: Consider digital options for crafts that are not easy to mail.

Making and sending holiday decorations for a deployed parent is a good way for students to feel they are reaching out and helping their parent. It’s also a way to bring absent parents into the preparations for a holiday. Remember that these should be sent well ahead of the event to allow for overseas mailing.

For packages to arrive in time for specific holidays, they need to be shipped well ahead of the date.

Consider digital ways to send gifts as well, if security allows. For any gift, check with the deployed member for security guidelines for real or virtual mail at the deployed location.

Party Invitations

Sometimes parents are invited to classroom celebrations, which will also affect a student with a deployed parent. Teachers might ask the student if he or she would like to invite another family member or friend. Another option is to use technology to welcome the deployed member into celebrations at home or in the classroom, perhaps via video chat or recording.

“The military member can join a class party, read a story to the class, or be a guest speaker about what it means to celebrate the holidays from across the world,” says Amanda.

Having a deployed parent celebrate virtually adds a new dimension to parties at home and involves everyone in the fun.

TIP: Invite a deployed parent to attend celebrations virtually.

“When my husband was deployed during our twins’ first birthday, I hosted a neighborhood celebration so I didn’t feel so alone,” Amanda says. “We had Dad Skyped into the party and put the computer on a table overlooking the celebration. Everyone at the party had opportunity to chat with him for a few minutes. When we were all distracted singing to the birthday twins, Dad, from the computer could clearly see older sister sticking her fingers in the birthday cake. He was waving and calling for her to stop, but no one could hear him over the singing. She looked over at Dad on the computer, smiled, and took another large fingerful of icing.”

Permission to Celebrate

Students may feel sad when a parent is absent or be hesitant to celebrate without mom or dad. It’s helpful for both parents to offer reassurance, says Amanda.

“The deployed parent can ask about special celebrations or activities before they occur” she says, to let the student know it’s okay to talk about events the parent is missing. “Ask the student to take pictures or describe the decorations and fun events. Then let the student show the pictures to the deployed parent and talk about the fun they had – or didn’t have.”

TIP: Provide opportunities to express feelings about missing a parent during the holidays.

These conversations open up opportunities to talk about feelings about deployment and absence. Another way to connect is for the parent to show pictures or video of their holiday celebrations or decorations, especially if there are decorations the family has made and sent. Seeing their handiwork in the parent’s location gives students a connection to the missing parents and where they are.

Military families know that every day is more challenging during deployment. Nevertheless, creativity and coordination between home and classroom can bring more joy to the holidays during deployment.

Dr. Amanda Trimillos is a military spouse, mother, and National Board Certified Teacher. As a wife, mom, and teacher, she has experienced multiple deployments during the holidays, both at home and in the classroom. Amanda is coauthor of Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers and Stories Around the Table: Laughter, Wisdom, and Strength in Military Life.

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When is the right time to inform teachers about a deployment? Before, during, after? The answer is all of the above. Teachers want to know about events in a student’s life that impact classroom behavior or learning. For military-connected students, this includes a parent’s deployment–before, during, and after. Educators can provide effective support for a student during deployment when they are informed about the deployment and can watch for potential emotions and reactions.

Before deployment

Be aware: Anticipation of a parent’s departure may cause emotional reactions even before deployment begins. The impending good-bye may affect the student’s academic performance and emotional triggers. Anger and frustration that a parent is leaving are normal reactions for a child. These feelings may leak into the classroom impacting homework, classwork, peer interactions, and class dynamics.

Take action: Explore any forms of support the school offers, such as deployment clubs and mentor programs. Consider others who could join the parent-teacher team for deployment support. These might include a school counselor, a Military Family Life Counselor, and any special teachers or coaches who are close to the student. Get parental permission, if  needed, before inviting others to the team. For the classroom, build a plan that allows the student a break if needed for emotional reactions at school.

During deployment

Be aware: A student may experience changes in behavior. Classwork content that includes current events or news about the military may trigger emotions. Extra absences may arise because of a mid-tour visit from the deployed parent.

Take action: Constant communication is key to a student successfully navigating a parent’s deployment. Parents and teachers should keep one another informed about any changes in behavior or grades. Be aware of current-events content that may be emotional triggers for a student. Offer homework extensions or passes as needed and in coordination with parents. With permission from the student and family, use a lesson on letter writing to have students write letters to the deployed parent. Use video chat to have the deployed parent read a story to the class via video chat (for lower grades) or be a guest speaker (for upper grades). Check first to be sure this will not be upsetting for a student. If time zone differences make parent/child communication difficult except during school hours, allow the student to have internet access for one-on-one video or phone conversations with the deployed parent.

After Deployment

Be aware: Reintegration of the absent parent back into the family begins the day of return and continues from six months to a year afterward. This period may be as difficult as the deployment. Students may expect the returning parent and life to return to normal right after homecoming, but in most cases, everyone is different after a deployment. The student has grown; the family may have adapted to life without their military member. Reintegration is a period of adjustment for everyone.

Take action: Again, solid communication is required in the weeks and months after a parent returns from deployment. Continue watching for signs of student distraction. Expect additional absences after homecoming. Adjust homework and behavior policies as much as possible. The student may need to miss school for family and community homecoming celebrations, and family vacations. Each of these reintegration activities are important in the rebuilding of the family unit at home and are protected in the Interstate Compact on Educational Opportunities for Military Children.

In any storm of military life, such as deployment, support systems at home, at school, and at all levels, should circle around a student. Before, during, and after deployment, support from the school and teachers can make a world of difference for a military-connected student.

Dr. Amanda Trimillos is a military spouse, mother, and National Board Certified Teacher. As a wife and mom, she has been through multiple deployments, and as a teacher, she has supported her students through many more. Amanda is coauthor of Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Ideas for Parents and Teachers and Stories Around the Table: Laughter, Wisdom, and Strength in Military Life.

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When it comes to getting a student established in a new school, the student’s timeline is more important than tradition. When military students move and enter a new school, parents should ask for a parent-teacher conference within two weeks of the student’s first day. This first face-to-face meeting is a time to note the student’s needs and strengths—the sooner the better. If this doesn’t fit the traditional parent-teacher conference time, it’s okay to break with tradition.

This is especially important if the student arrives when the academic year is already in progress. The first conference is an introduction between the student-advocacy team, when teachers get to know the student and parents and vice-versa. It’s also a time to establish a baseline the team can use to measure the student’s progress at the next meeting.

Establishing a baseline

At this baseline meeting—if they haven’t already done so—parents should present the Education Binder to show the student’s education history. If the teacher has already seen the binder, this is a good time to discuss it. This is the parent’s opportunity to inform a new teacher about the child’s journey, including:

• Multiple school changes,
• Details of past curricula, student work samples
• Peer concerns
• Upcoming deployments
• Living arrangements, for example if the family is waiting on household goods
• Goals and hopes for the school year

Together, the conference and binder, including letters from past teachers, will accelerate the “getting to know you” process. In this meeting, parents are initiating the new student advocacy team, essential for the student’s growth and success.

Evaluating progress

After parents and teachers meet the first time, subsequent conferences—which may include traditional parent-teacher conference time—are opportunities to evaluate the student’s progress.

At the baseline meeting, parents introduce the student and share any initial concerns and requests. Follow-up meetings provide time for teachers to give parents a window into their child’s performance thus far, revealing strengths, areas for improvement and potential adjustment issues.

To maximize the potential of the parent-teacher conference, parents and teachers should come prepared with a list of questions to assess how the student is settling into the classroom, academically and socially.

• Is the student comfortable with his peers? Does he spend time with friends at lunch or recess?
• What is her demeanor in class? Does she participate willingly in discussions and projects?
• What are the student’s academic and personal goals? How can parents work toward these goals at home?
• Are there upcoming deployments, homecomings and extended TDY’s?

Students should also have a seat and a voice at the conference table and come prepared with questions or concerns. As the student grows, so should her role and participation in the student-advocacy team.

During a conference, write down significant dates—for upcoming evaluations or standardized tests—and set reminders to follow up on concerns and progress. Take notes and add them to the Education Binder.

Conference Time Follows Student’s Timeline

A conference is a vital communication tool for teachers, parents, and students, not a burden on anyone’s schedule. For parents, asking for a baseline conference is a way to jump start the new student-advocacy team. For teachers, knowing more about each student helps set and accomplish classroom goals.

When a student is new, parents and teachers should not hesitate to initiate a conference even if it’s not conference time on the school calendar. The schedule for a new student may need to follow the student’s timeline, not tradition.

Stacy Allsbrook-Huisman is an Air Force spouse, writer, mother, and military child advocate. As a parent-to-parent trainer for the Military Child Education Coalition, she led workshops and seminars about military-connected students. She is the coauthor with Amanda Trimillos of Seasons of My Military Student: Practical Tips for Parents and Teachers.

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